Tea leaves

The itch has given way to a pervading numbness.  The simplest tasks seem fraught with a level of complication I cannot bear to confront.  But lying in bed is no longer an option.  I need to rise, move, breathe the late summer air.  So I get out of bed and shower, resentfully, hating the world and everything in it.  I dress and walk out, heading nowhere in particular but suspecting that I'll end up with a cup of coffee and a desire to return home quickly.

I can barely stand my own existence at this moment. 

It begins anew...

...although it has happened many times before.  There is a feeling, not unlike an itch, deep inside me, that pervades every cell.  It is there in the morning, before my first cup of coffee.  It doesn't sleep when I do, it only gets stronger when I close my eyes.  It creeps into every conversation, whether banal or magnificent.  It is profound and consuming.

It is you.